Card Games becaome the Law

[dw5chaosfan 8]

Gin,"Why don't we duel to decide whether or not I turn my self to the Police?"

Conan,"now that card games are law, I suppose we should."

"Duel!!!!"*both of them light on duel disks and draws 5 cards*

25 turns later...

Gin,"I fusion summon Chimeratech over dragon with >9000 atk! You lose!"

Conan,"I force you to end your turn by playing defense draw and flash bang. I drw again since it's my turn and then special summon my own cyber dragon, play ancient rules to special summon scrap golem, then double summon a LV1 tuner and regular monster. Veiler your chimeratech and then synchro for shooting Quasar with 4000 ATK while your Chimeratech has 0 due to effect veiler. Attack 3 times for game."

Gin,"FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.**"

[dw5chaosfan 8]

Feel free to give regards to my insane story.

[tengaku squared 291]

Not even worth commenting on. Just saying.

[Aeyra 260]

Sorry, buut I don't get it. -.-'

[dw5chaosfan 8]

Who understood the last part of the dialogue?

[dw5chaosfan 8]

Who wants me to make a crappy ending to this story?

[Aeyra 260]

Not really.... I bet you could make this into a good crossover if you added detail (like, a lot a lot of it) gave background information (again, a lot a lot) and finally, proofread all your grammar

[tengaku squared 291]

Not really.... I bet you could make this into a good crossover if you added detail (like, a lot a lot of it) gave background information (again, a lot a lot) and finally, proofread all your grammar

Of course, I personally doubt such a thing would happen.

I LOL at your score. It is an all time low 6%. Way to go. Woo.

Lower than 15% - Abysmal

Oh my, you must have done something HORRIBLE to your story to let it have an Abysmal rating. This rating basically means that your story is worse then nuclear waste, in my opinion. I hate reading these kind of stories, so most of the time I will not read these stories through.

Details:

Starting Impressions: Maximum: 1 point

• Is it neat? (Yes...but it is only a paragraph long). 0/1

Format: Maximum: 2 points

• Is the format concrete (does the story remain in 1st person, etc.)? If it is not, does the author give warning of a format change? (Yes, it stays in one format) 1/1
• Does the format make sense for the story? (No. For yugioh fanfics, I like 1st person.) 0/1

Grammar & Punctuation: Maximum: 3 points

• Are there any errors? (Yes. Some.) .5/1
• Do they impede, or disrupt the story? (Yes) .5/2

Personality: Maximum: 3 points

• Do characters have any sense of personality? (Nope.) 0/1
• Do characters's reactions make sense according to their personality? (No.) 0/1
• Does their personality MAKE SENSE? (Nope. 0/1)

Plot: Maximum: 5 points

• Does it make sense? (Nope.) 0/1
• Does it generate excitement, or otherwise spark interest in the reader? (Was amusing. But that feeling ended quickly.) .1/2
• Is there any order, however unobvious? (No order.) 0/2

Overall Presentation: Maximum: 6 points

• Does it leave the reader overall satisfied? (Heck, I could do better than this.) 0/2
• Does it leave the reader wanting more, or leave on a great conclusion? (I don't want to read more of this.) 0/2
• Does it show effort? (Considering your previous comments, and "25 turns later...", I'd say no.) 0/2

[dw5chaosfan 8]

Then just label this project as fail and start a new one-which I already did and it makes a lot more sense.

[tengaku squared 291]

This story is a FAIL.

[dw5chaosfan 8]

Guys this story is a fail so go to miracles in despair it is much better.

[tengaku squared 291]

Guys this story is a fail so go to miracles in despair it is much better.

Which is spelled Miricle in Despair, which I am SURE he did on purpose. [/sarcasm]

[dw5chaosfan 8]

It's my stupid typing mistake for God's sake I wish I was writing!!(my handwriting is really sloppy but I spell everything correctly)

[tengaku squared 291]

my handwriting is really sloppy but I spell everything correctly

That just made no sense.

[dw5chaosfan 8]

I meant when I was writing on paper.

[kkslider5552000 0]

I'm in despair. People thinking these jokes are funny has left me in despair!

[Aeyra 260]

Sigh.. So that's what Moho-kun calls abysmal... I could personally never live writing like that. My minimum is over 3,500 words a chapter for most of my stories now. If I get below 4,000 it irritates me...

[IdentityUnknown 216]

Sigh.. So that's what Moho-kun calls abysmal... I could personally never live writing like that. My minimum is over 3,500 words a chapter for most of my stories now. If I get below 4,000 it irritates me...

*checks* I'm pretty sure you had less than 4000 words per chapter for "Because We Are Detectives", I know my computer well and on OpenOffice, you need about 9 pages to be 4000 words (since that's my limit for most stories besides random drabbles and oneshots).

I see what Mark calls abysmal now...I never thought that day would come...

As for me, I thought the story had very little description, was completely random, the characters were OOC, and the story didn't make much sense. Sorry, CS.

[Aeyra 260]

*checks* I'm pretty sure you had less than 4000 words per chapter for "Because We Are Detectives", I know my computer well and on OpenOffice, you need about 9 pages to be 4000 words (since that's my limit for most stories besides random drabbles and oneshots).

I see what Mark calls abysmal now...I never thought that day would come...

As for me, I thought the story had very little description, was completely random, the characters were OOC, and the story didn't make much sense. Sorry, CS.

BWAD is short because I originally wanted to slap the parts together as a one-shot, but I have 4,000 word chapters now. It's hard to judge on an iTouch though.

[Kiel95 86]

NO COMMENT

[Senpai 1]

really?

[Misaki-chan 164]

It was... Amusing. Strange, but amusing.