Misaki-chan 164 Report post Posted May 7, 2011 Good job! Keep it up! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JiKudo 5 Report post Posted May 8, 2011 :-D i still cant read it. im too lazy to read. give me more time for it. hohoh ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JiKudo 5 Report post Posted May 8, 2011 i have read the 3 chapters! hohoh~ nice story!!! next please!!! i wanna be part of it. well, prolly, someone who loves luxury cars and always laughing. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JiKudo 5 Report post Posted May 8, 2011 even a villain will do. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JiKudo 5 Report post Posted May 8, 2011 edit: used to laugh alot.. hohoh ~ :D Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aeyra 260 Report post Posted May 8, 2011 edit: used to laugh alot.. hohoh ~ :D Don't quadruple post.... If you want to add something, use the edit button. Some members will get really, really mad at you for that. I'm just warning you. Yes! I actually almost solved it! (I was on the bus reading a book on the Lindbergh case while reading your story... Homework comes at the same time as DCW...) Mwahahahaha! Good work! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JiKudo 5 Report post Posted May 8, 2011 Don't quadruple post.... If you want to add something, use the edit button. Some members will get really, really mad at you for that. I'm just warning you. Yes! I actually almost solved it! (I was on the bus reading a book on the Lindbergh case while reading your story... Homework comes at the same time as DCW...) Mwahahahaha! Good work! awts! sorry. thanks for the warning! ill remember that for sure! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rum 6 Report post Posted May 9, 2011 wow nice story... *gives an ice cream* by the way I like the part when Kid the Phantom thief got shot in his head... I immediately said yes! my enemy got shot in the head hahaha Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IdentityUnknown 216 Report post Posted May 9, 2011 I still think Horovimocic is Mohorovicic...am I the only one who thinks so? Or maybe I'm paranoid Not a bad chapter. Of course, a few grammar/spelling/plot errors, but nothing big. The hint might be debatable though... Don't quadruple post.... If you want to add something, use the edit button. Some members will get really, really mad at you for that. I'm just warning you. People like me. But I'll refrain from getting angry. Oh, and Hano: “What we know, is that the White Organization are people from another organization. Unfortunately, we don’t know who that organization is or what they are doing. But we hope that, when the WO (White Organization) gives us some leads, pointing at the other organization,” explained Cammy. Conan never mentioned another Organization, so why would Cammy mention that explicitly? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JiKudo 5 Report post Posted May 9, 2011 I still think Horovimocic is Mohorovicic...am I the only one who thinks so? Or maybe I'm paranoid *nods* me too. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kid the Phantom Thief 252 Report post Posted May 9, 2011 wow nice story... *gives an ice cream* by the way I like the part when Kid the Phantom thief got shot in his head... I immediately said yes! my enemy got shot in the head hahaha I liked that part too! DX *evil laugh* Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rum 6 Report post Posted May 9, 2011 I liked that part too! DX *evil laugh* haha oh wait that means your really dead in the story? O.O Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kid the Phantom Thief 252 Report post Posted May 9, 2011 haha oh wait that means your really dead in the story? O.O Idk.. it's not my story... ¬.¬ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hejle 20 Report post Posted May 9, 2011 Oh, and Hano: Conan never mentioned another Organization, so why would Cammy mention that explicitly? Because, Cammy is with FBI (another part, than to one Jodie is with) and they allready made some researching on their own, finding out that the WO originally came from another Organization. Then Conan realize that the other organization is BO... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hejle 20 Report post Posted May 9, 2011 Chapter 4 (Looking into Misaki-chan’s eyes) “Forever Lost, we saw something on the video camera. It was our three suspects: the wife, brother and the wife’s brother entering this apartment. They entered in following order, first was the wife’s brother, then the wife and last, the brother,” said one of Forever Lost’s policemen. “But the order they left was different, with the wife first, then the brother, and the brother of the wife.” “I got it,” said Kudo-kun. “The criminal is the wife’s brother.” “On what have you built that theory?” asked Forever Lost surprised. “Simple, he was the only one capable of doing it,” answered Kudo-kun. “Firstly: He was the first to arrive but last to leave. Most likely was he the one with the time to do it. Secondly: The victim was 1.70 meter high. In order to stab the victim in the chest, while being behind the victim, the murderer needed to be higher than the victim, or use a chair. But there are no signs of chair usage and by doing that he would risk the victim recognizing him. This is how it happened. The murderer entered and talked to the victim. As he was saying his farewell, someone entered the apartment. He took the chance and hid himself somewhere in the apartment, probably the kitchen. Afterwards when he was sure they were alone, he stabbed the victim.” The murderer confessed to everything after being arrested.. It seemed like Kudo-kun solved another case. Meanwhile, I walked around, giving those crying souls, cookies. Some people even accepted a hug. I persuaded the others, as they were heading to the police station, to find Chelseaj500. (Looking into Hano’s eyes) As we appeared in front of the house, we heard an evil laughter. We feared the worst, so we ran in only to see a woman, randomly laughing. When we came closer to her, we realized it was not an evil laugh, but a creepy laugh. “OHOHOHOHOHOHOHO,” said a crazy woman. “Are you by any chance Chelseaj500,” Cammy asked her. “Yes I am,” said the crazy woman. “OHOHOHOHOHOHO” We all heard some footsteps, which indicated someone was coming close. Aeyra-chan guessed there were 3 people, because of the footsteps ratio. Then the three unknown people entered the room. All of them were wearing white coats and holding guns. “Get away Chelseaj500, they are going to shoot you,” shouted Aeyra-chan. “OHOHOHOHOHOHO, that will never happen,” answered Chelseaj5000. “OHOHOHOHOHO” Then, while she was laughing, someone shot at her, but missed just by 5 mm. “OMG, you are not lying,” said Chelseaj500 scared. “What the fuck are you doing, Cola-light(not a member of DCW),” asked Cola angrily. “Get them.” We found cover in a second. Cammy found a gun and answered to the shooting. It was getting tense. She handed a knife over to me, so I would be able to cover her, if someone got to close. Aeyra-chan, found out, that Cammy shot once every ten second, while they shot once every third second. She also noticed that in 2 minutes, we would not have any ammo left. We left the kitchen, headed for the car, but ended up in some room, that was used for storing frozen food. There was a set of stairs in the room leading down to the wine cellar. When there were 30 seconds remaining we rushed down to the cellar, to gain some time. By hiding in the cellar, we gained 1.5 minute. Then we ran out of ammo. What should we do? I started praying my final prayers. Then someone shot the member known as Cola-light. He died instantly. It was the woman who saved us from the bomb in the house. She shot at the other members known as Cola and Fanta. They were not hit, only retreated. “Thanks,” said Cammy. “I am your new recruit,” said the unknown, mysterious woman. “What’s your name then,” asked Cammy. “Pyre,” sounded the answer. Soon after Misaki-chan, Forever Lost and Detective Kudo arrived. Because it was late at night we decided to regroup the next day at my house. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kid the Phantom Thief 252 Report post Posted May 9, 2011 "When we came closer to her, we realized it was not an evil laugh, but a creepy laugh." That was the best part! Sorry.. yes, it was really a great and funny story! So keep writing! We wanna see more! MORE!! So, hurry up! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hejle 20 Report post Posted May 9, 2011 Ahhrg... Shut up KtPT... It's my story... I also need to sleep... And according to my files - you are dead... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kid the Phantom Thief 252 Report post Posted May 9, 2011 WAH!? :shock: SCARY~! I can't die, cuz I'm Go- Ouch, MOM! That really hurt! Tch! Mothers! Nothing but trouble! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JiKudo 5 Report post Posted May 9, 2011 chap 4!!! will read this later! :wink: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IdentityUnknown 216 Report post Posted May 10, 2011 I'm FBI? O.o So...if Horovimocic is Mohorovicic, I get to go against him, ne? Great! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tengaku squared 291 Report post Posted May 10, 2011 I'm FBI? O.o So...if Horovimocic is Mohorovicic, I get to go against him, ne? Great! I'm currently this guy that apparently lives in Haido City. In addition, my involvement hasn't been gone into yet. Oh yes, and I'm a suspect. Never forget that. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aeyra 260 Report post Posted May 10, 2011 Just as a personality thing for me... I wouldnt be doing math if people are shooting at me... I'd probably end up trigger-happy or run. Just depends on how much sugar I had. But other than that, it's good. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rum 6 Report post Posted May 11, 2011 Ahhrg... Shut up KtPT... It's my story... I also need to sleep... And according to my files - you are dead... oh cool he's dead *happy* and IU there is so cool haha IU your so cool! (be happy it's the first time I compliment you!) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hejle 20 Report post Posted May 11, 2011 oh cool he's dead *happy* and IU there is so cool haha IU your so cool! (be happy it's the first time I compliment you!) I feel happy - I think... ??? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rum 6 Report post Posted May 11, 2011 I feel happy - I think... ??? oh no no! the be happy comment is for IU... sorry T.T... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
