Lovestruck 70 Report post Posted August 5, 2011 . 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Black Demon 466 Report post Posted August 5, 2011 Nice story ! Keep it up ! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lovestruck 70 Report post Posted August 5, 2011 Nice story ! Keep it up ! So so so sweet from ya.. Wait 4 part 2 please! Thx 4 ur support (: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lupin of the Heisei Era 248 Report post Posted August 6, 2011 it's nice~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lovestruck 70 Report post Posted August 6, 2011 it's nice~ U really cheer me up (: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Stopwatch 36 Report post Posted August 6, 2011 O.o... I think you need to get someone to look over this and correct the grammar and spelling before posting, saying 'U' instead of 'you' in a fic is . . . not very good if you want people to take it seriously. Also, using a bigger variety of words would be advisable, don't keep on having Conan 'shouting', get out a thesaurus if you're stuck on what sort of words to use. Well, good luck with improving . . . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kiel95 86 Report post Posted August 6, 2011 helloooo <3 so far iz pretty good ^0^ there are definitely grammatical errors and spelling errors... but i still liked the story :3 with a bit of touching up it'll be great! also the characters are a bit.... well... out of character... i dont know if that was your intention... i mean, i usually have mine slightly out of character on purpose... but i've no clue whether u wanted yours OOC (out of character) anyways, can't wait to read more~ (ah and as stated previously, i suggest spelling out words completely for a fanfic... otherwise it doesn't seem very professional like...) anyways, good luck! i'm rootin for you! make sure its AICON/SHINSHI FTW!!! <3 <3 <3 keep on keepin on Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lovestruck 70 Report post Posted August 6, 2011 O.o... I think you need to get someone to look over this and correct the grammar and spelling before posting, saying 'U' instead of 'you' in a fic is . . . not very good if you want people to take it seriously. Also, using a bigger variety of words would be advisable, don't keep on having Conan 'shouting', get out a thesaurus if you're stuck on what sort of words to use. Well, good luck with improving . . . Thx! Can u correct it for me and send it in a PM? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lovestruck 70 Report post Posted August 6, 2011 helloooo <3 so far iz pretty good ^0^ there are definitely grammatical errors and spelling errors... but i still liked the story :3 with a bit of touching up it'll be great! also the characters are a bit.... well... out of character... i dont know if that was your intention... i mean, i usually have mine slightly out of character on purpose... but i've no clue whether u wanted yours OOC (out of character) anyways, can't wait to read more~ (ah and as stated previously, i suggest spelling out words completely for a fanfic... otherwise it doesn't seem very professional like...) anyways, good luck! i'm rootin for you! make sure its AICON/SHINSHI FTW!!! <3 <3 <3 Thx for ur advice, I'll complete it as soon I can without grammar mistakes! And sure it's AiCon ftw!!! Hehe (: Nice to meet new AiCon fan.. keep on keepin on Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HaibaraAiFan 0 Report post Posted November 10, 2011 nice one Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
aika 23 Report post Posted November 27, 2011 It's definately different and good story Some mistakes but still awesome I enjoyed it. +1 rep you should continue writing. Looking forward to part 2 :grin: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
