Shizuki 10 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 Hi, everyone! Recently, I've known some people who needed support, and advice. So, I thought: "I should create a topic on DCW for anyone who needs help, support, or even advice!" The title also says: "WE'VE got your back", which indicates the entire DCW community! I really hoped I helped with this topic. And I also hope that everyone could be understanding...let the beauty of the world be seen through each of us!! =D Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Parkur 165 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emiko Seiei 46 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 Um...okay, I guess I'll be the first person to ask some questions xD so here goes... wat would u do if the person u like hasn't been talking to u lately? should u jus move on? or continue to persist? also... wat do u do if the person u like likes someone else? should u move on? or fight for him? ps. these questions are ones my friends has asked me, but i didn't kno wat to tell them. so i hope to find help for them here. ^ ^;; one more question...(this is for more of myself) wats the best way to keep troublesome kids calm? how can u keep them quiet or entertained long enough so you can rest? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IdentityUnknown 216 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 Um...okay, I guess I'll be the first person to ask some questions xD so here goes... wat would u do if the person u like hasn't been talking to u lately? should u jus move on? or continue to persist? also... wat do u do if the person u like likes someone else? should u move on? or fight for him? ps. these questions are ones my friends has asked me, but i didn't kno wat to tell them. so i hope to find help for them here. ^ ^;; one more question...(this is for more of myself) wats the best way to keep troublesome kids calm? how can u keep them quiet or entertained long enough so you can rest? 'Kay, I'll try to answer these to the best of my knowledge. Making it so that both genders are able to relate. What would you do if the person you like hasn't been talking to you lately? Should you just move on or continue to persist? Most people automatically assume, "Oh, he/she hasn't been talking to me lately, I must've done something wrong and he/she must hate me." FIrst, consider this. Have they been acting differently towards anybody else? If so, maybe they're going through a tough phase in their life. Don't take it personally. Go and talk to them and try to coax out of them what's wrong. If you don't feel like they'd tell you or it would make things worse, give them some space. They will most likely come around eventually. They could also, for instance, be busy. Everyone has some kind of a life and they may not have enough time to catch their breath. In this case, just give them some space and they'll probably start talking to you again. If they've only been treating you differently, then think why. Have you done anything displeasing? Have you told any of your friends that you like him/her? Maybe your friend told the person you like that you like him/her and he/she is avoiding you. If that's so, still give them space, but spend a little time talking to your friends. Don't fuss over it too much unless you know you've done something that they don't like. If that's the case, apologize. What do you do if the person you like likes someone else? Should you move on or fight for him? Man I hate this situation. Personally? I wouldn't fight. I would say to myself, "Okay, it's a fact that he likes someone else. I'll live." I hate fighting over people. But I'm not the type who's going to give up hope either. I'll just stand there and keep watching, keep hoping. If you truly care for someone, their happiness is more important than yours. You like her? Alright, go for it. I'll stand here and cheer you on, because I care for you in a way that I'm willing to make a sacrifice on my own part if it'll make you smile. You can't have a true and good relationship if you don't have a mutual feeling. And liking someone beyond friendship isn't something you can force out of anybody. However, that's my take and opinion on the situation. Since this happens more commonly for those who are friends in the beginning, keep up your friendship and keep smiling. What's the best way to keep troublesome kids calm? How can you keep them quiet or entertained long enough so you can rest? You seem to be looking towards the "kid should be independent enough to do his own thing and leave me alone." That means, in most cases, two things. 1. TV 2. Computer These are the two most commonly used methods by parents these days to keep their kids entertained. You can also look into their interests and have them do painting, coloring, reading, (if you have a backyard) playing outside with you watching them, etc. This tends to be for kids who are more independent though. However, if the kid needs to do homework or something, this is how you do it. "Ok. You finish your math homework and you can watch 15 minutes of so-and-so TV show." or "After you finish 2 pages of your homework, you can take a 10 minute break." Really, kids are externally motivated so you need something to get them working and doing the job. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emiko Seiei 46 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 'Kay, I'll try to answer these to the best of my knowledge. Making it so that both genders are able to relate. What would you do if the person you like hasn't been talking to you lately? Should you just move on or continue to persist? Most people automatically assume, "Oh, he/she hasn't been talking to me lately, I must've done something wrong and he/she must hate me." FIrst, consider this. Have they been acting differently towards anybody else? If so, maybe they're going through a tough phase in their life. Don't take it personally. Go and talk to them and try to coax out of them what's wrong. If you don't feel like they'd tell you or it would make things worse, give them some space. They will most likely come around eventually. They could also, for instance, be busy. Everyone has some kind of a life and they may not have enough time to catch their breath. In this case, just give them some space and they'll probably start talking to you again. If they've only been treating you differently, then think why. Have you done anything displeasing? Have you told any of your friends that you like him/her? Maybe your friend told the person you like that you like him/her and he/she is avoiding you. If that's so, still give them space, but spend a little time talking to your friends. Don't fuss over it too much unless you know you've done something that they don't like. If that's the case, apologize. I see that makes sense. for my friend's situation, it's more of "he's only ignoring her" right now. She's not really sure what happened... they were talking together happily and stuff, but he just suddenly stopped talking to her. it's weird... What do you do if the person you like likes someone else? Should you move on or fight for him? Man I hate this situation. Personally? I wouldn't fight. I would say to myself, "Okay, it's a fact that he likes someone else. I'll live." I hate fighting over people. But I'm not the type who's going to give up hope either. I'll just stand there and keep watching, keep hoping. If you truly care for someone, their happiness is more important than yours. You like her? Alright, go for it. I'll stand here and cheer you on, because I care for you in a way that I'm willing to make a sacrifice on my own part if it'll make you smile. You can't have a true and good relationship if you don't have a mutual feeling. And liking someone beyond friendship isn't something you can force out of anybody. However, that's my take and opinion on the situation. Since this happens more commonly for those who are friends in the beginning, keep up your friendship and keep smiling. I think the same way. If you truly love someone, their happiness should be ur happiness right? Even if they're happy with someone else... But watching and hoping that something will happen, that he just might fall for you instead, is ...depressing, and not a very effective way to do things. dont you think? ur only wasting time and bringing urself down if ur not going to try, then wats the point? ya kno? but thats just my opinion... i'll make sure to tell my friend about ur advice. it's very helpful! thanks <3 What's the best way to keep troublesome kids calm? How can you keep them quiet or entertained long enough so you can rest? You seem to be looking towards the "kid should be independent enough to do his own thing and leave me alone." That means, in most cases, two things. 1. TV 2. Computer These are the two most commonly used methods by parents these days to keep their kids entertained. You can also look into their interests and have them do painting, coloring, reading, (if you have a backyard) playing outside with you watching them, etc. This tends to be for kids who are more independent though. However, if the kid needs to do homework or something, this is how you do it. "Ok. You finish your math homework and you can watch 15 minutes of so-and-so TV show." or "After you finish 2 pages of your homework, you can take a 10 minute break." Really, kids are externally motivated so you need something to get them working and doing the job. That's a good idea! I can't believe I didn't think of that xD Rewarding the child with a break or some free time sounds like a good idea. Thanks for the help IU!! I appreciate it very much ^ ^ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IdentityUnknown 216 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 I see that makes sense. for my friend's situation, it's more of "he's only ignoring her" right now. She's not really sure what happened... they were talking together happily and stuff, but he just suddenly stopped talking to her. it's weird... Ask. Really, that's the only way to go right now. Yes, it's blunt. No, there's not much of another way. I think the same way. If you truly love someone, their happiness should be ur happiness right? Even if they're happy with someone else... But watching and hoping that something will happen, that he just might fall for you instead, is ...depressing, and not a very effective way to do things. dont you think? ur only wasting time and bringing urself down if ur not going to try, then wats the point? ya kno? but thats just my opinion... i'll make sure to tell my friend about ur advice. it's very helpful! thanks <3 Depressing? Yes, it is. I know that firsthand. It really depends on how much you care for that person and how much you're willing to sacrifice. Then again, it might just be maturity. I don't know. If you don't want to suffer, then giving up and distancing yourself is the best way to go. It's harder when you were originally friends though. The point? To support them. To watch them. To live with the what-ifs but to not look back, because you know that you've brought happiness to someone else. To love them from a distance. Eventually, you'll accept it and grow out of it. It's painful, but time dims the pain. That's a good idea! I can't believe I didn't think of that xD Rewarding the child with a break or some free time sounds like a good idea. Thanks for the help IU!! I appreciate it very much ^ ^ : It's how I keep my sis happy. You're welcome. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emiko Seiei 46 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 Ask. Really, that's the only way to go right now. Yes, it's blunt. No, there's not much of another way. Being blunt does seem like the way to go. I think she's done that already. He hasn't been replying to her emails and such though... Depressing? Yes, it is. I know that firsthand. It really depends on how much you care for that person and how much you're willing to sacrifice. Then again, it might just be maturity. I don't know. If you don't want to suffer, then giving up and distancing yourself is the best way to go. It's harder when you were originally friends though. The point? To support them. To watch them. To live with the what-ifs but to not look back, because you know that you've brought happiness to someone else. To love them from a distance. Eventually, you'll accept it and grow out of it. It's painful, but time dims the pain. wow...u make unrequited love sound so ..nice. well i hope time will pass by quickly for her to avoid less pain... : It's how I keep my sis happy. You're welcome. lol i see xD that makes sense. i'm usually good with kids. but for some reason i just cant get these kids to sit quietly ^ ^;; and thanks again. u dont kno how much i appreciate it :'D Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IdentityUnknown 216 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 Being blunt does seem like the way to go. I think she's done that already. He hasn't been replying to her emails and such though... Then ask face to face. The problem with emails and everything is that you can't always get the right message across and you often say things you wouldn't say in real life. wow...u make unrequited love sound so ..nice. well i hope time will pass by quickly for her to avoid less pain... Nice? It's the most painful thing in the world, to sit and do nothing and cheer for something you don't support, to live with the what-ifs and to wonder if you could be in their shoes. But...maybe it's just me but I'm not going to force anything on anyone. Especially not that way. I hope so too...but I hope for more than that. I hope for her dream to come true. lol i see xD that makes sense. i'm usually good with kids. but for some reason i just cant get these kids to sit quietly ^ ^;; and thanks again. u dont kno how much i appreciate it :'D I really wish some kids were a little more on the "I-can-entertain-myself" side, but it could be worse. You're welcome. <3 No worries. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AiSuigetsu 110 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 Then ask face to face. The problem with emails and everything is that you can't always get the right message across and you often say things you wouldn't say in real life. I think i know which friend she's talking about in her case, its more like moho suddenly stops talking to you he still talks to others and occasionally he'd reply to ur status or something but he wont reply directly to anything you direct toward him and his replies to ur status would be really vague but you cant contact each other face to face because you only know each other online if me and her are thinking about the same friend, that's what's happening Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IdentityUnknown 216 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 I think i know which friend she's talking about in her case, its more like moho suddenly stops talking to you he still talks to others and occasionally he'd reply to ur status or something but he wont reply directly to anything you direct toward him and his replies to ur status would be really vague but you cant contact each other face to face because you only know each other online if me and her are thinking about the same friend, that's what's happening Hmm. :/ Then I'd probably try through a friend. And this part isn't advice, but at the same time I'd be beating myself up. Do a lot of thinking about why. Because nobody randomly stops talking to you for no particular reason. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emiko Seiei 46 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 I think i know which friend she's talking about in her case, its more like moho suddenly stops talking to you he still talks to others and occasionally he'd reply to ur status or something but he wont reply directly to anything you direct toward him and his replies to ur status would be really vague but you cant contact each other face to face because you only know each other online if me and her are thinking about the same friend, that's what's happening *nods* yesh yesh same friend :3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IdentityUnknown 216 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 *nods* yesh yesh same friend :3 ... Man, you remind me of Forever. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AiSuigetsu 110 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 Hmm. :/ Then I'd probably try through a friend. And this part isn't advice, but at the same time I'd be beating myself up. Do a lot of thinking about why. Because nobody randomly stops talking to you for no particular reason. i see ill tell her that she said that she didnt do anything thou, other than kinda hinting that she was falling for this guy and that it was kinda serious however, he was the one who acted on her first by sending her "mushy" msg and <3s do you think maybe that guy figured out that it was him and is trying to avoid her? :/ she's kinda depressed right now Dx maybe even more that i was once upon a time Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IdentityUnknown 216 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 i see ill tell her that she said that she didnt do anything thou, other than kinda hinting that she was falling for this guy and that it was kinda serious however, he was the one who acted on her first by sending her "mushy" msg and <3s do you think maybe that guy figured out that it was him and is trying to avoid her? :/ she's kinda depressed right now Dx maybe even more that i was once upon a time Well, it's always possible. Still, I would try to get to him through a friend if one to one isn't working. So this guy likes someone else? I hate that kind of situation. In that case...give him a little space and a little time. Focus on something else. Come back to it later. Let her clear her mind. Do something that lets her forget. Then come back and try to be plain friends with him. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AiSuigetsu 110 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 Well, it's always possible. Still, I would try to get to him through a friend if one to one isn't working. So this guy likes someone else? I hate that kind of situation. In that case...give him a little space and a little time. Focus on something else. Come back to it later. Let her clear her mind. Do something that lets her forget. Then come back and try to be plain friends with him. oh actually, that's two different cases the first question and the second question (that emiko proposed) are for two different friends ^ ^; sry for confusing you Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IdentityUnknown 216 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 oh actually, that's two different cases the first question and the second question (that emiko proposed) are for two different friends ^ ^; sry for confusing you Hmm. :/ Still, it should work for the first friend as well. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AiSuigetsu 110 Report post Posted October 10, 2011 Hmm. :/ Still, it should work for the first friend as well. i see thx! im sure ur advice will be much appreciated Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
